Originally published at American Family. Please leave any comments there.

I have really enjoyed the comments on the last post.  

The thing I have come to realize about myself is I don’t really love BIG cities.  There is something about being inside that massive tightly-packed urban space that makes me feel very claustrophobic. 

I was talking to a friend yesterday about the things that I like about the mid-sized city (suburb) we live in.  I think it is that we get a lot of the perks of city life without the hassle inherent in big-city living.   Moving to a bigger city, we would most likely have to give up the following things we like about living here:

• Proximity to our extended family.
• About a 20 minute commute to downtown, even at rush hour.
• One of the country’s best library systems only one block away.
• Extremely low cost of living (Our house isn’t fancy, but it only cost about $225,000)
• The girls can walk to their elementary, Jr. High and High School.
• Walking to the farmer’s market, ice cream store and pub.
• Extremely low crime rate
• The convenience of living in the suburbs (e.g. can drive to get groceries, park in our driveway and unload), but still in a real neighborhood.
• Access to nature (lots of parks, state parks, etc)
• Kid-centered community

It is the extended family that really makes this decision so difficult.  We could manage (even if we didn’t enjoy) giving up the other thing.  The big things that our city lacks?  So far, Chinese immersion school seems to be the only one that matters.  

I thought that by moving to a bigger city, I would be happy about the possibilty of more diversity.  The research I have done, shows that it isn’t necessarily the case in the cities we are considering in the areas where we would want to live*.  In fact, most places the percentage of Asian kids in the girl’s school would go down.  I like the idea of more comprehensive diversity, but when push comes to shove, I still don’t want them to be one of very few Asian kids.

The fact of the matter is we probably wouldn’t have much choice of where we get to go.  If Mr. A decides to apply for the job he wants, we would probably pick 3 cities and only apply there.  But the odds of getting the job aren’t super-high, so we would just have to go where luck takes us.

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*Yes, I realize that the areas we prefer says a lot about our privilege and the reality of our committment to diversity, but it is what it is.